Before we begin, we need to emphasise that this is not a scientific quiz. Many of the questions here are based on our own experiences, the experiences of our friends and general research. If you do have suspicions about a potentially cheating partner, then taking this quiz may help you understand where your suspicions are coming from. Clarifying your thoughts may help you talk your concerns through logically with your partner.
Answer each question with a yes or no. Every time you answer yes, score 1 point.
- Can you smell an unfamiliar perfume/aftershave on your partner or their clothes or in their car?
- Do text messages no longer appear as notifications on the home screen of their phone?
- Do you feel as if your partner is intentionally trying to pick fights with you or others who share your home?
- Do you have a gut feeling that your partner’s feelings towards you have changed?
- Does there suddenly seem to be an urgent need for your partner to work late, or do they have an absorbing new sport/hobby/activity that is meaning more time apart from you?
- Does your partner close the lid on a laptop, or put down a phone if you walk in on them unexpectedly?
- Does your partner hate answering questions about where they've been or what they've been up to?
- Does your partner have additional toiletries in their car?
- Does your partner have two phones?
- Does your partner often place their phone screen down?
- Does your partner leave the house every now and then, using the silliest of excuses or walking the dog more frequently if you have one?
- Does your partner take their phone in to the toilet or bathroom?
- Has your partner been overly attentive to you for no apparent reason?
- Has your partner changed any passwords without telling you?
- Has your partner recently changed their routine to give them more time alone or out of the house?
- Has your partner recently walked out of the house after a disagreement?
- Has your partner started positioning their computer or phone facing away from you, something they would not normally do before?
- Has your partner started getting fiercely protective about their space?
- Has your partner started staying up later at night or getting up earlier in the morning?
- Has your partner started taking more care over grooming their pubic area?
- Has your partner started using mints or gum to freshen their breath before they come home?
- Has your partner improved their under-garments, or if female wearing only matching sets or started wearing stockings instead of tights for example?
- Has your partner suddenly given you a gift completely out of the blue or out of character for them?
- Has your partner suddenly stopped mentioning someone when you know they must still interact?
- Has your sex life started to change, either reduced or with the introduction of different techniques?
- If you unexpectedly walk into a room or come home early does it seem as if your partner is attempting to hide something or appearing surprised or even angry?
- If you walk into a room unexpectedly does your partner act jumpy or nervous?
- Is there a certain tension in the air when the name of someone is mentioned?
- Is there a change, something you can't truly put your finger on but nevertheless is making those alarm bells ring?
- Is your partner claiming to be very busy working, but still look fresh and happy when they get home?
- Is your partner more distant from you or not as affectionate as usual?
- Has your partner started to use their phone while talking with you – for example prioritising social media or a message/email over your conversation?
- Is your partner generally taking more care over their appearance?
- Is your partner using their phone more than they used to?
- Is your partners phone frequently on silent or vibrate only?
- Is your partners phone locked with a password or PIN that they will not share?
- When your partner gets home have they started to head straight to the bathroom or going for a shower?
- If your partner travels with work, have they started leaving earlier or getting back later?
- Has your partner started acting either more or less jealous or possessive towards you?
- Has your partner started working out more or trying to lose weight or get fitter?
- Has your partner become overly concerned with your whereabouts?
- Is your partner taking more cash out of a shared account and perhaps spending less via more traceable routes like credit cards?
- Has your partner got a new credit card you do not recognise?
- Does your partner take longer to answer your texts or voice messages, or is their phone often unexpectedly off or 'out of range'?
- Has your partner stopped making plans for the future?
- Has your partner made a point to say they are unhappy?
- Has your partner ever cheated before, either with you or in a previous relationship?
- Has your partner's best friend been a little distant from you - perhaps not wanting to engage in conversations about your partner?
- Does your partner generally like taking risks?
- Is your partner capable of telling a convincing lie, even if for something lovely like a surprise party?
When you have answered all the questions, add up how many times you answered yes and then double the result. If you answered yes 18 times, there is a 36% chance your partner may be cheating on you. Of course this doesn't mean that they are but now you have a good idea what it is about their behaviour that is making you feel unsure.
Talking things through with your partner, getting their thoughts on your concerns, gauging their reaction to your discomfort, will go a long way to helping confirm or dispel any suspicions you have.
If you feel like you are being lied to, then there are lots of things you can do to get to the truth and yes we can help with that. Food for thought perhaps?
Call us on 0800 688 9007 if you'd like to chat about your situation and what we might do to help you get the facts.